Looking to Regain His 2023 Form, Verstappen Consults Barry Allen
July 24, 2024

"He’s tried everything from complaining to his engineer...to complaining about the stewards."

CENTRAL CITY—Max Verstappen, the once-dominant Formula 1 driver, has turned to an unconventional source to regain his 2023 form: Barry Allen. After a season marked by unbeatable speed and precision, Verstappen has struggled to maintain his edge, prompting him to seek extraordinary measures to reclaim his former glory.


"Max has been searching for any way to get back to his peak performance," said a source close to the driver. "He’s tried everything from complaining to his engineer to complaining about the car, but nothing has worked as well as he hoped."


In his quest for answers, Verstappen came across Barry Allen, a forensic scientist who gained superhuman speed after a freak accident. A lightning bolt struck Allen's lab, shattering a case full of unspecified chemicals and drenched him. This incident temporarily knocked him out, but upon waking, Allen discovered he could run at super-human speeds and had enhanced reflexes and senses.


"Barry's story was unlike anything I'd ever heard," said Verstappen. "The idea that someone could gain such incredible abilities like that made me wonder if I could somehow harness a similar power for my racing. This guy knows what he's doing, unlike SOME people I know."


Barry Allen offered Verstappen some intriguing advice. "To recreate what happened to me, you'd need to be in the right place at the right time with the right conditions," Allen explained. "It’s not something I’d recommend trying lightly, but if you’re that determined, you just need to be struck by lightning while drenched in chemicals. I can hook you up with the chemicals"


Skeptics have raised concerns about the safety and feasibility of such an endeavor. "Max needs to be careful," warned Dr. Emily Roberts, a sports scientist. "Attempting to replicate an accident like Barry’s could be incredibly dangerous and could result in him driving for Alpine next year."

More Recent News

By Jonnathan Perez June 14, 2025
RIVERSIDE—The average age of used vehicles in the United States has officially reached 12.8 years, according to new industry data released this week. But experts warn that the real number skyrockets to 60 if you include all the cars currently sitting on jack stands in driveways, garages, and questionable Facebook Marketplace ads.
By Jonnathan Perez June 13, 2025
DETROIT—Despite dismal sales, nonexistent marketing, and no dealerships, Alfa Romeo continues to exist in North America. Somehow. There’s only one possible explanation: a secret society is keeping it alive.
By Jonnathan Perez June 13, 2025
WASHINGTON, D.C.—With many mildly horrified but completely unsurprised, the White House has formally requested that Mercedes-Benz resume production of the 770—a massive luxury car originally built for top Nazi officials during the 1930s and 40s.
By Jonnathan Perez June 12, 2025
LOS ANGELES—Recently uncovered studio notes have revealed that the 2000 cult classic Dude, Where’s My Car? was originally conceived as a gritty, grounded drama centered on Honda owners waking up to discover—shockingly—that their Civics had been stolen.
Show More

THE SHOP

EMAIL:
info@ninetyoneoctane.com

TEXT:
(424) 259-2428‬

S T A Y  T U N E D