This Year, Santa Swaps Coal in Stockings for Rolling Coal on Naughty Kids
December 25, 2023

"These kids don't deserve me coming down the chimney with coal...."

NORTH POLE—Santa Claus is redefining his naughty list by taking a more modern approach. Instead of sticking to the traditional practice of leaving coal in stockings, Santa has decided to "roll coal" on the naughty kids, making it clear that he won't be delivering any gifts to those who've made the naughty list.


This unexpected shift in Santa's tactics has caught the attention of both parents and children alike, sparking a mixture of curiosity and concern. Rolling coal, a term typically associated with diesel trucks emitting thick black smoke, is being used by Santa to send a powerful message to the mischievous children.


Santa's decision has even led to a statement from the North Pole, where an official spokesperson remarked, "Santa is keeping up with the times, and he believes that a more impactful consequence is needed for those who find themselves on the naughty list. Rolling coal serves as a visual reminder that actions have consequences, and he hopes this unique approach will encourage better behavior next year."


In an exclusive interview, Santa himself shared his perspective on the matter. "These kids don't even deserve me coming down the chimney with coal. They need something that will make them think twice about their actions. Rolling coal is a way to show them the consequences of being naughty in a language they understand," Santa explained.


Parents are divided in their opinions on Santa's new strategy, with some applauding the creative disciplinary measure and others expressing concerns about the potential environmental impact. Regardless, one thing is certain—Santa's unconventional approach is generating conversations about the role of discipline and consequence during the holiday season.


As Christmas approaches, children on the brink of landing on the naughty list might find themselves wondering whether Santa's sleigh will be carrying gifts or a cloud of coal smoke. Santa's decision to roll coal has added an unexpected twist to the age-old tradition, leaving everyone eager to see how this modernized version of holiday discipline will play out.

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