The automotive community has responded with mixed emotions.

SPRINGFIELD—In an unprecedented move, the editors at Webster’s Dictionary have officially removed the phrase “my project car is almost done” from the English language, citing “decades of unrelenting misuse” by car enthusiasts around the world.

“The phrase has lost all semantic value,” said Webster’s senior linguist Denise Carroway. “It no longer conveys meaning, truth, or even vague optimism. It’s just noise—usually followed by someone asking for a tow strap or a trickle charger.”

The decision came after years of internal debate and countless complaints from frustrated friends, significant others, and group chats flooded with false hope. Linguists finally determined that the sentence, though grammatically sound, is functionally broken.

“We found that 99.8% of the time, the person saying it still needed to finish wiring, repaint the bay, tune the ECU, and 'figure out the idle,'” said Carroway. “One guy claimed he was ‘almost done’ in 2016. We checked—he’s still almost done. That’s not language. That’s delusion.”

The automotive community has responded with mixed emotions.

“I don’t get it,” said project car owner Alex Núñez, sitting on a milk crate next to a jackstanded Nissan S13 with no engine. “I am almost done. I just need an engine, a new harness, a better diff, a different turbo setup, wider wheels, and a respray. But after that? Yeah. Basically done.”

Meanwhile, mechanics and spouses of enthusiasts have welcomed the change.

“I haven’t seen the garage floor in four years,” said Marisol Gutierrez, whose husband has been “almost done” with his WRX since their honeymoon. “Removing the phrase is a step toward accountability. Or at least silence. I’ll take either.”

To replace the now-deprecated phrase, Webster’s suggests more accurate alternatives, such as:

– “I’ve made peace with never finishing it.”

– “It runs, but I wouldn’t say it drives.”

– “It’s a lifestyle, not a destination.”

Despite the backlash, Carroway stands by the decision. “Language evolves. And sometimes, it sheds the lies we keep telling ourselves. Especially when those lies have been sitting on jack stands since 2001.”

At press time, thousands of Craigslist ads were quietly updated from “almost done” to “needs TLC.”